HT Schuyler: Jack and Jill Review

Posted: November 22, 2011 by htschuyler in HT Schuyler's Movie Reviews

Rated PG for crude, unfunny, immature humor, mild language and mature themes.

Starring: Adam Sandler, Katie Holmes, Eugenio Derbez and *sigh* Al Pacino.

Directed by: Dennis Dugan.

After seeing J. Edgar (easily one of the best made films of the year) PG Cooper and I decided to do something really stupid and see Adam Sandler’s latest abomination of cinema, Jack and Jill. Now, just as a disclaimer, I don’t hate Adam Sandler. He’s made some genuinely  funny movies, and he’s made some…not so funny movies as well. So, is Jack and Jill a terrible, offense piece of turd that could be titled as one of the worst movies ever made, or is it a fine piece of art that the whole family can experience and share multiple laughs as Sandler brings us another work of genius?

Adam Sandler plays Adam Sandler, this time under the name of Jack Sadelstein, who is dreading the annual visit from his sister Jill (Jack and Jill…GET IT!?), also played by Adam Sandler. So, she arrives and immediately starts annoying Jack with her obnoxiousness, and the rest of the movie is literally just set pieces of Adam Sandler in drag, doing a bunch of crazy, immature, juvenile things. She goes on a game show, spends time with Jack’s kids and ultimately pisses the audience off with her absurdity. And that’s it. Literally, the movie does little more than just show Jill’s character going around annoying people. Eventually Jack tries to set up a date for Jill, only to lead to more HILARITY when the date shows up and (surprise surprise) thinks she’s ugly. This guilts Jack into trying to make Jill feel better by trying to spend more time with her. Thrown into the mix is the gardener (played by Eugenio Derbez) who will occasionally toss out a racist joke, only for him to obnoxiously chant “I’M JUST KEEEEEEEEDING!” This failed attempt at a running joke causes the audience to question their motives f0r viewing this thing. Katie Holmes also shows up to join the party, playing Adam Sandler’s wife (I’m as confused as you are). The entire time she just bitches at Jack to spend more time with his sister, while occasionally looking off camera to see if the producers still have her paycheck. Nick Swardson (fresh off his latest role as “Bucky Larson”), joins the fun as Jack’s partner/assistant person who will now and then indirectly say something anti-semitic, which apparently is funny, and again tries to create a running gag that makes tumbleweeds angry for having to work overtime. But the most offensive person to be involved with this is yet to come, when we are introduced to an actor who must really hate his agent, as we witness one of the greatest actors alive make a complete fool of themeselves; Al Pacino. He is first seen a Laker’s game with Johnny Depp (my theory is that he just happened to show up on set, unaware of what he was doing  and the director just went with it), and the embarrassment evolves as he soon falls in love with Jill. Damn it.

What can I say about the acting? Everyone phones in their performance here, except for Adam Sandler, but that isn’t a good thing! One of my biggest problems with this film is that the character of Jill is just too broad and annoying, so it would have been better if he had just toned down his “performance” just a little bit. Katie Holmes is just sort of there, and isn’t really given a lot to do, which can actually be said about all the actors in here. They all just do a half-assed job, then leave to collect their paycheck. Al Pacino had me in tears…not because of how funny he was, just because the entire time all I could think of was that this is AL PACINO. The Godfather, Scarface, Scent of a Women, all leading up to what? Jack and Jill. He isn’t bad per say, but he acts like a fool, which is just flat out offensive. It saddened me to see just a great actor in such a film. The movie had a budget of 79,000,000. 90% of that better have gone to him!

The Good:

“Good” is a bit of a generous word for this film. Perhaps “The Tolerable” would be better. Very rarely would there be a joke that I would chuckle at, but, they were there. Occasionally Jack would say a line that would reference something funny and I would chuckle, but then almost for guilty afterwards for just how juvenile it was. Al Pacino would make me laugh, and occasionally a side character would say something funny. David Spade shows up (dressed up as a women, of course) and he had me laughing, mainly just because it was David Spade. There would be some physical humor that I would find amusing, but just because it showed some of the characters getting hurt, which is appreciated at this point. When Johnny Depp is first shown, you see him sitting there wearing a Justin Beiber T-shirt, which, I’ll admit, is pretty funny. Also, there is a scene at the very end (SPOILER ALERT…not like it matters) where Al Pacino and Adam Sandler are watching a commercial that Jack made starring Al Pacino, and the commercial is one of the worst things on the planet, and once it’s over Al Pacino looks over to Jack and says “This can never be seen by anyone”. This made me laugh because it must have been what Al Pacino actually said to Adam Sandler once he saw the final cut of the movie…but unfortunately he didn’t listen.

The Bad:

There is no way I could list everything that is bad with this film, but I’ll do my best to cover the basics. The main problems are: There is no plot, and it’s not funny. The entire movie is just unfunny set pieces, and it all boils down to Jack and Jill going on a cruise together, which honestly just felt like one big advertisement for the cruise company. You are asked to sympathize with Jill’s character, as she doesn’t have any other family than Jack, and he treats her poorly, but you really can’t blame him, because how can you sympathize with a character as annoying and perverse as Jill? Wait, let me rephrase, how can you sympathize with a character that is ADAM SANDLER IN DRAG?!?!?!?!? You can’t, and that is the biggest flaw of the film. You are never invested emotionally, you don’t care about ANY of the characters, and every scene is just one big, long, unfunny joke that doesn’t have a punchline. This film is also outrageously offensive. It’s offensive to Al Pacino, not just as a respected actor, but also as a human being, as the type of things they make him do (for example, hitting on Jill, acting like an idiot, singing and dancing like a fool…ex) are things that no human should have to degrade themselves to do. It’s also an insult to audience member’s intelligence, that being said, there were people in the theater who laughed, and I’m sure some people thought it was good. PG Cooper absolutely loved it…………………………….I’M JUST KEEEEEEEDING! (…sorry…popular demand…).

What more can I really complain about? Look at the trailer for this film, it looks like a parody, not an actual movie. This film is crammed full of bad, immature jokes (toilet humor, fart jokes, etc) unfunny characters, stupid plot points and a terrible conclusion that tries to make you feel sympathy for one of the most unlikable characters in a comedy film I’ve seen in a while.

In Conclusion:

The few chuckles I got were not worth the time wasted watching this. This movie is just so damn lazy. It doesn’t try to do anything original, and it slaps audiences members in the face then laughs at them for being dumb enough to see this. I was so pissed off after this movie I had to go see A Very Harold and Kumar 3D Christmas just to get the bad taste out of my mouth. Sure that movie is dumb, but it has some actual clever jokes, good characters, a plot and is freaking hilarious. This is just crap. Plain and simple. Before seeing this movie, the worst theatrically released film I had seen this year was Just Go With It, and it looks as if Adam Sandler has outdone himself, creating not only the worst movie I’ve seen all year, but one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. I’ve seen bad direct to DVD movies that have had more imagination and creativity than this, and yeah it may not look as flashy but at least they tried. This is unimaginative garbage, and something that I warn people not to see. This is a brutal film that treats its audience like an idiot and makes a fool out of everyone involved. Avoid this film at all costs.

1/10

Comments
  1. CMrok93 says:

    This one blew but had a good line or two mainly because of Pacino and the 2-minute scene from Depp. Good review HT.

  2. Dude.

    I liked it. Whats up? A 1/10??

    I KEED, I KEED!!

    When you pointed out the film’s budget – not that I dont trust you mind you – I RACED to IMDb, thinking noooo…

    But, YES. 79 MIL! You know some FAT paychecks went out for this one. But its funny (Im an accountant by day – dont tell anyone) I wonder if that “Budget” figure takes into account the revenue they got from Dunkin’ Donuts for literally working an enormous Duncaccino commercial starring Al Pacino into the entire DNA of the movie.

    It’s hard to disagree with anything you say here other than J. Edgar being “easily one of the best made films of the year”. Uoohhfff. :D

  3. HT Schuyler says:

    You didn’t like J.Edgar? It may not have been the best of the year, but in retrospective after watching Jack and Jill….it was Citizen Kane compared.

    I totally agree with the Dunkin’ Donut’s comment, the ammount of product placement in this film was insane. I hope those companies are happy for what they’ve funded :(.

  4. They were both bad in different ways man, hate to say it.

    J Edgar was some slow boring stuff.

  5. 5plitreel says:

    I could never in a million years bear to watch this. I gagged when I saw 5 seconds of the trailer. Adam Sandler is manifestation of the devil on Earth isn’t he? Bringing about sorrow and despair to anyone who sees his film.

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